Monday, March 06, 2006

Five Things I Thought about the Oscars

Number One: I am very annoyed that Crash won for Best Picture. I apologize in advance for anyone who liked the movie, but I just thought it was awful. I thought it was trite and cliche and, worse, I thought it grotesquely simplified the whole problem of race relations in America. If the movie had been made 30 years ago, maybe I could see why it was important. But the main thesis of the movie--which seemed to be, simply, that people of different races have deep-seeded prejudices against each other--is not a new concept. I actually found parts of the movie really offensive. Things are just not that simple. Any scene in the movie could have been taken right out of Law & Order.

Number Two: "Best Song" shouldn't be a category. I mean, I guess certain songs have been very important to the movies they were in..."As Time Goes By" and "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" come to mind...but usually the songs are sort of arbitrary. If anything maybe they should give the song an "honorary Oscar." That song from Hustle and Flow was catchy, but it wasn't all that. It was just a catchy rap song. The other songs weren't better, but the whole award is a sham. It should be cancelled.

Number Three: I loved Will Ferrell and Steve Carell's skit for the Best Make-Up Award.

Number Four: Best Dressed--Felicity Huffman, Nicole Kidman, and Jennifer Aniston. (Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know Jessica Alba looked hot. (But, as you may know, I have a deep-seeded aversion to her and it would pain me to put her on this list.)

Number Five: Worst Dressed--Charlize Theron, Michelle Williams, and Naomi Watts.

I haven't mentioned my girl Reese Witherspoon because Jean wants to talk about her and, quite frankly, I have lost all perspective on both Reese and Joaquin at this point. I have watched Walk the Line three times since it came out last Tuesday.

Jean's Take:

Number 5: My hands-down favorite dresses of the night were Jessica Alba (sorry jenny), Jennifer Lopez and Salma Hayek, with Salma Hayak being the my favorite. EAT YOUR HEART OUT ED NORTON! What a waste of Jennifer Lopez that she's with Marc Anthony. Nobody's interested in that union.

Number 4: I'm sorry, but I HATE the entire cast of Dawson's Creek! So I am SO glad that Michelle Williams did NOT win for her performance in Brokeback Mountain, AND she had the ugliest dress at the Oscar's. Secondly, i'm glad we didn't have to lay your eyes on TomKat! That would have ruined my night.

Number 3: As for Reese Witherspoon, I must say, i'm her biggest fan, and a true Legally blonde fan (the original, not the sequel). And i was hoping she wouldn't sound so cliche. But i still love the girl, and i'm very happy she won.

Number 2: I REALLY liked Philip Seymor Hoffman's speech, how he gave props to his mamma! That was so cool!

Number 1: I cannot believe how great Jennifer Aniston looked! But unfortunately all of that was ruined by everyone saying how "confidently she looked and walked", as if all she has to cling to is LOOKING confident, because of course she can't actually be truely confident, since every day, more of the Brangelina Saga unfolds. Sadly, the press keeps reminding us of how she should still be crying.


femme feral said...

I liked MW's dress, and I actually thought the black dresses were boring.

The oscars, like the moves, seemed a bit anemic to me.

do you know if alot of people tuned in?

Anonymous said...

I agree with your take on Crash, Jenny. I especially hate how the commentators on E! kept talking about how "experimental" it was, how the plot and structure were so "innovative." Since when is it innovative to use multiple intersecting storylines? It's ironic that people were praising Haggis on the same night that the man who practically invented this type of storytelling technique, Robert Altman, was being awarded an Honorary Oscar. Unfortunately, I don't think the commentators on E! have ever seen Nashville. If they had, they might have some sense of what intelligent social critque really is. But of course, why should they care? Nashville never won an oscar. A.

leash said...

i am absolutely floored by crash upsetting BM. crash wasn't even a good movie:
a) it was trying too hard to be a good movie. it was like, "hey look at me! i'm a movie about racism and racism is bad, here's why." the movie was pointing out the obvious. the movie had no artistry about it at all...acting was mediocre (come on, does anyone here take sandra bullock seriously??? or, any movie with brendan fraser in it, should be automatically banned from the best picture category)

for me, this may have been the most upsetting thing the academy has done..

what about paul g. losing. again. this guy gets no respect. everytime i look at george c. i want to vomit, how much more pompous could he be????

Donny B said...

Interesting dress choices. I liked Michelle Williams' dress color, but not the dress so much. And Lopez's dress looked like they attached curtains to her hips. I agree with FF that all the black ones were too boring, except I liked Felicity's plunging neckline (work it, girl!).

And when did Hilary Swank have like four ribs removed? She is so tiny.

It's interesting that you guys made that comment about Best Song, because the Hustle & Flow song is integral to its story, which is why I understand it would win over the others, which were just background and/or end credits songs.

Dop said...

I liked CRASH because it scared me - not to the point of social change or anything, but just inside the theater. I was afraid to emote at all in the movie theater for fear that I would offend someone else in the audience. Try watching the movie in a DC theater where you are surrounded by all types of people. It's intimidating.

Jenny said...

Maybe the Grammy awards should have a category "Best Song from a Movie." I guess it just seems like a whole different art form, you know? I mean directing, sound editing, cinematography seem more related than best song.

And, yeah, I agree that seeing Crash in a theater could be uncomfortable. I'm sure that was one of the things the directors were going for. I saw it in my own apartment while I was lying on the couch.

Emily said...

If Michelle William's dress had been another color, I would have loved it...That color is suspiciously close to what we in my family refer to as baby-poop-brown. Although I guess it's more mustard.

Charliez's dress looks like it's about to swallow her whole, and Naomi Watts looked like she was clawed by wild animals just before hitting the red carpet.

Any thoughts on John Stewart? I found him generally charming and fairly funny...but the whole show seemed kind of blah.

Though I did love Will Farrell & Steve Carell's bit, and I also quite enjoyed Meryl Streep and Lilly Tomlin. And not ONLY because I think Meryl streep was looking absolutely gorgeous -- she actually wins best dressed among the old actresses as far as I'm concerned.

Oh yeah, and I really didn't care that he won, but I do love George Clooney. And I love the woman who won for some award that didn't hold my interest and thanked the academy for seating her next to George clooney at the nominees' luncheon.

Bloglisted said...

I agree, Emily. JS = good. Award show = blah. And I am starting to become a huge George Clooney fan.

Donny B said...

Did anyone else think that Naomi Watts' dress looked like it could have been designed by Project Runway's Santino? All that mesh and netting...ugh.

Dubette said...

How can you just hate an entire cast of a show? What about Josh Jackson? Busy Phillips? Jean, I can't believe you make such sweeping statements. It hurts me.

And I LIKED Michelle Williams' dress and thought her performance in Brokeback was wonderful.

Tina from Glitterati said...

I liked Brokeback Mountain, but it wasn't the best movie I've ever seen. I liked Crash and although I thought it was better, again--not the best I've ever seen, either. However, I thought Matt Dillon was outstanding and should have won hands down. Being a fan since his early days, this was by far, the performance of his career.

On the other hand, Walk The Line was in a class by itself and was the total package deal; Joaquin was robbed!